Work, Life, Harmony

I have four children, I am a widow, and have survived layoffs, recessions, disabilities, and loss. I’ve been to my share of weddings, graduations, football games, family vacations and birthdays parties. I’ve navigated all these with the help of federal employee protections, supportive family and friends and most of all , my personal choices.

US Labor Day in September recognizes the contributions of North American workers to the development and accomplishments of our civilization. We enjoy the rights provided to US employees as a result of the labor union, women’s and civil rights movements. Paid time off, five day work weeks, pregnancy as a disability, family leave, and minimum wage are benefits that were fought for and won. 

As women constitute 50 % of American workers, and 23% of all head of households. Among married households, the share of women heads of household is 46% of working parents; meaning wives earn more than their husbands. Work life balance is an ever elusive goal for all workers, and women especially, whom shoulder child care and elder care disproportionately. Financial stability, health and peace all seem subordinate to the chase for this crown. The real goal should be harmonizing all aspects of ourselves and accept that we will be out-of-balance sometimes.

The pursuit of a “soft-life ” has become a movement, born of this goal. Post-COVID isolation, we all understand that life is fleeting, relationships are important and we should re-prioritize our focus and efforts on things that bring us joy. The soft life involves an exercise of self-awareness; what makes you happy? 

I believe happiness is the end-result of finding peace, harmony and balancing passion and purpose everyday.

Passion is a feeling that gives you joy when you perform an activity. You may or may not be “good” at the activity; i.e not able to perform it well enough to earn a living from it or have others enjoy it. But you love doing that thing so much that you look forward to doing it; no motivational talks needed.

Purpose is not necessarily the same engine as passion. It’s wonderful, if it is the same, and certainly makes living life more efficient. My belief is that purpose is tied your talents and ability to help others and gives joy to others. This is where work and career choice plays a part. Sometimes your purpose includes philanthropic, unplanned or involuntary efforts; like giving advice, support or just being a role model for someone.

Self-care, financial down-sizing, sabbaticals, medical treatment are activities that may not balance out with our responsibilities and purpose. Yet they are important to living a harmonious life. Set boundaries, ask for help, pour into yourself, know your rights. You’ll find that soft-life after all.